i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
