So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Randomize
