that's an acceptable place to lick
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
Randomize
