I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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