look no pants
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
