I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize
