Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
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