Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
Ketchup is God's man juice
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
