Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
