Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
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