I'll bet she douches with gravy.
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
