Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
