Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
