Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
