So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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