hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
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