I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
