so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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