Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
