there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
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