great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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