I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
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