For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
there is glitter all over my balls
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
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