How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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