dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
