I can't watch pbs sober anymore
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Randomize
