Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
the day after is always just damage control
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize
