worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Randomize