As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Randomize
