WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
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