Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
