my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
I would ride that face into the sunset
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
Randomize
