The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
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