IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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