Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
