spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Randomize
