Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
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