google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Randomize
