Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize
