When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
