I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Randomize