At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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