can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
