Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Randomize
