Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Randomize
