No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize
