So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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