Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize