better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
