kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
Randomize
