yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Randomize
