We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
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